Humanity Death Watch

Bird of prey and her captured drone embroiled in controversial romance

This falcon and its drone bitch are expecting, a disturbing trend for species traditionalists.

Part of a trend? This falcon and its bitch drone are expecting, a disturbing prospect for species traditionalists.

With the issue of human and robot marriage slated to become the next big civil rights issue, a Dutch eagle and her captured drone are proving that a biological creature and a machine can live together in harmony.

“I’ve never seen anything like it,” said raptor keeper Adam Aaltink. “Our eagle, Anouk, brought the drone back to her nest and instead of tearing it apart she snuggled close and draped a wing and leg over the drone, like she was spooning it. The drone looked perfectly content to be there. Eagles mate for life, so the chemistry must’ve been undeniable.”

The bird first snatched the DJI Phantom 4 Drone out of the air during a routine test, but Anouk didn’t come back for hours, prompting her trainer to send a drone to search for the missing bird and her captive.

What that drone found shocked the raptor training community while eliciting an outcry from those in opposition to human-robot romances, who say that even animal-robot relationships are morally wrong despite animals’ and robots’ inability to comprehend the human idea of morality.

“It sets a bad example and may set a dangerous precedent,” said Phil McKracken, president of Biologicals Organized for a Moral Environment. “These mixed-bag love affairs essentially give people permission to just marry a battery-operated sex toy if they want. It’s not right.”

Photo credit: Birds 1 – Drones 0 by Day Donaldson, licensed under CC 2.0

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