Humanity Death Watch

Apple Watch fetches record sum on Antiques Roadshow

The original Apple Watch drew praise. “For centuries, we’ve checked the time by looking at our phones,” said Ellen DeGeneres. “Having it on your wrist? Genius.”

The original Apple Watch drew praise. “For centuries, we’ve checked the time by looking at our phones,” said Ellen DeGeneres. “Having it on your wrist? Genius.”

Historical experts were baffled yesterday when a decades-old Apple Watch was appraised for $2.3 million on the long-running TV series Antiques Roadshow. It was revealed today, however, that the appraisal was a ratings stunt perpetrated with the staff of a rejuvenated prank show now called Punk’d on PBS.

“Yep, it was all a joke,” giggled Punk’d on PBS senior producer Ashley Butcher. “I want to thank our colleagues from Roadshow for allowing us to get back into the public eye.”

“We won’t be doing this again,” said a peeved Alden Fogeyman, longtime host of Antiques Roadshow. “This was foisted on us by the network. This is a new low for PBS. I don’t care that this was our highest-rated episode this century. If I was in this business for ratings, I wouldn’t be on PBS.”

Couple with antique mask on Antiques Roadshow

Was fake Apple Watch appraisal a new low for high-brow PBS?

When Butcher was informed about Fogeyman’s reaction, he shrugged and grinned. “I’m a fan of Roadshow,” said Butcher. “Smart people watch that program. We thought people would realize right away that the Apple Watch was a piece of crap back from 2014. I mean, what was Apple thinking when they brought that thing out? The watch was too big, but even so the screen was too small. The battery sucked. And apps never worked on it.”

Butcher said the premise of the prank was based on the audience forgetting that despite high reported sales of the product, its practicality was severely lacking. “The pet rock, Chia pets, the mansiere and the Apple Watch were all in the same historical category, we thought,” Butcher said. “Go figure.”

Photo credits: Homemade Apple Watch by Post Memes, Antiques Roadshow in Kansas City by KPCT, licensed under CC 2.0

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