Humanity Death Watch

Content creation android to replace all viral web writers

Masters of wit and brevity, Content Creation Androids created by Google are popping up everywhere.

Masters of wit and brevity, Content Creation Androids created by Google are popping up everywhere.

The U.S. unemployment rate skyrocketed two percentage points almost overnight after Google’s new Content Creation Android hit shelves at electronic stores across the nation. The Android, known as C.C., promises to render all viral web writer jobs obsolete.

Online companies expressed their satisfaction with C.C.’s content creation algorithm, which generates clickable articles based on current trends and upcoming hashtags. Some economists expressed concern, however, that layoffs of viral content writers will flood the employment market with unskilled labor.

“What we’re seeing now in the job market is a surplus of frustrated liberal arts majors with no discernible skills,” said economist Jon Fuller. “Most are too proud or weak to take factory jobs, so they’re being evicted from their overpriced apartments and have no place to go.”

Some are taking to the streets, wearing clothes tattered by design. One former Buzzfeed editor was seen carrying a sign saying, “One simple trick to ending unemployment? When I found out … blew my mind.”

Asked about the controversy surrounding the layoffs, a Content Creation Android purchased by Cracked responded, “It’s a tragedy. But I’ve got 12 ways to solve the unemployment crisis. Number nine will shock you!”

Photo credit: Android at Google by Roman Boed, licensed under CC 2.0

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